Hole in Me.

(I wrote this years ago - I want to make that clear. Did I feel like this when it was written? Yes. Can I still see something of myself in these lyrics? Yes. Am I suicidal? Not really...)



I've got a cavernous hole that I can't fill up
I can't eat enough food, I can't take enough drugs
I can't drink enough wine, I can't get enough sex
So, I'll pour myself another glass and love it to death.

I've got a hole in me.

The reflection in my mirror is a sight I hate
I can't stand my body, I despise my face
I hate this hunger, I detest this need
That makes me gnaw on my fingernails 'til they bleed.

I've got a hole in me.

No one seems to notice that I'm hanging by a thread
In bed, full of dread, for the day ahead
Now the demons of delirium are invading my space
My brain is overloaded, god I need some peace.

I've got a hole in me.

Nobody can love me, no one stays around for long
Despite my good intentions, everything turns out wrong
I'm a broken and beaten suicidal mess
With a lot more demons than the ones I confess.

I've got a hole in me
A great big hole in me
A big black hole in me.